I use the English Standard Version of the Bible for my daily reading. Before that, I used the New American Standard Bible. They are closely related and most of the time their translations are just about the same. But occasionally they differ more dramatically.

Today, as I read Philippians, I came across one of those instances.

Philippians 2:3-4 from the ESV:

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Other translations call us to consider others ‘better’ than ourselves and to look to others ‘good’ above our own. The ESV, on the other hand, calls us to consider others ‘more significant’ and to look to others ‘interestes’.

Now, I don’t know if this is the best way to translate this verse, but I love the sentiment which we know is good from reading the rest of scripture. Especially the concept of ‘interests’ rather than just ‘good’.

As Christians, it’s good for us to place ourselves in the shoes of our brothers and sisters in Christ. To take the things they enjoy and the things that are important to them and care about them ourselves as well. In any relationship, this is a way big that we show love to one another. By taking notice and care for other people’s interests and passions.

In a previous discourse, Paul had been rough with the Corinthians. He had revealed and called out their sin. They were broken by it and brought low. In his letter, Paul comments on their reaction.

2 Corinthians 7:8-9:

For even if I made you grieve with my letter, I do not regret it—though I did regret it, for I see that that letter grieved you, though only for a while. As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief, so that you suffered no loss through us.

Paul, though he had ‘hurt’ the Corinthians, felt no remorse for doing so because the ‘hurt’ they felt was only temporary and lead to their repentance from the sin which he called out. Which, in turn lead to their greater experience of God’s grace and greater joy therein. Not so much unlike the way that God disciplines us for our ultimate good—which often times hurts.

Though it’s absolutely crucial that we check our own hearts and motives in this, I think we should remember Paul’s conduct with the church in Corinth. There are some times that we withhold from our brothers and sisters what they need to hear because the issue may be sensitive. We may know that it will ‘rough them up’ a bit for it to be brought to conversation.

Yet, where the Gospel is concerned and clear, we should be willing to inflict ‘pain’ on those we love in order that they may have a better chance at Joy. Yet, we must keep close in mind, that if the heart isn’t right, this is null.

And, likewise, we should remember that when our brothers and sisters hurt us in the name of the Gospel, though it may be some time before we (or they) understand it, it leads to joy. When we are hurt by our brothers and sisters, we need to stay our anger and wait to see what God will produce from that pain.

I was reading about Saul’s conversion today in Acts. It’s a familiar story. And, a great evidence that God doesn’t need a permission (per se) to make believers out of us by his Spirit. But, that’s not really so much what I’m writing about today.

After Saul was blinded God told him to go and wait for a man called Ananias. What I find so interesting is the way Ananias addresses Saul when he finally meets him.

“Ananias departed and entered the house. And laying his hands on him he said, ‘Brother Saul, the Lord Jesus who appeared to you on the road by which you came has sent me so that you may regain your sight and be filled with the Holy Spirit.’ "

Ananias refers to Saul as ‘Brother Saul’. That word ‘Brother’ is the Greek word ‘Adelphos’. It literally refers to a blood brother. But, it’s also the word commonly translated as ‘Brethren’, as in the following. 1 Thes. 1:2-5:

“We give thanks to God always for all of you, making mention of you in our prayers; constantly bearing in mind your work of faith and labor of love and steadfastness of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ in the presence of our God and Father, knowing , brethren beloved by God, His choice of you”

There is no record that Saul (yet to be renamed ‘Paul’) had made a profession of faith. As far as we know at this point, Saul had been terrified by a bright light and a booming voice which knocked him to the ground, all of which was followed by blindness.

I’d imagine that more than anything, Saul was terrified. And, having been confronted by Jesus himself, was truly broken in Spirit. Yet there was no open profession of repentance. I’d imagine at this point that he probably didn’t even grasp the idea of grace distributed through faith in Christ’s work.

Yet, besides that, Ananias refers to Saul as ‘Brother Saul’. Though Ananias could have been pointing out their shared heritage, it seems more likely that Ananias was acknowledging that God had chosen Saul and that whether he knew it or not (at this point) he was one of the Brethren.

I’m uncertain what application this thought might have to our own lives and relationships. But on the front end, it means that I may have to reconsider what I consider a ‘Brother’ to be. Perhaps there are Brothers in my life that neither I, nor they, quite know they’re in the family yet. But, it will only be a matter of time.

Twice in the last short stretch of Jesus’ high priestly prayer he mentions the concept of unity. And both times he attaches it to the world’s belief.

John 17:20-26:

“I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one,  I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me. Father, I desire that they also, whom you have given me, may be with me where I am, to see my glory that you have given me because you loved me before the foundation of the world. O righteous Father, even though the world does not know you, I know you, and these know that you have sent me. I made known to them your name, and I will continue to make it known, that the love with which you have loved me may be in them, and I in them."

He illustrates unity by his own relationship with the Father (a relationship marked by perfect love and respect). “Just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you…”. Then, moves on to express how this unity opens opportunity for the world to believe. He distinctly makes this comparison twice, all within just a few breaths. All of the Word is crucial, but I think we would be wise to pay special attentions to things that God saw fit to say over and over again.

Now, I don’t necessarily believe that the splintering of denominations is a bad thing. In fact, that’s really much to large an argument for right now. But even in the existence of many denominations within our faith, this prayer for unity isn’t lost.

See, when the world looks at the Church and dismisses her because she has splintered into all these different sects, I don’t think it’s the disagreements they’re seeing and responding to, it’s their lack of love, respect and cooperation.

Lets say there were an agency started by two friends. Its business was to help deal with conflict resolution in families. If the two business partners had a disagreement and out of frustration and anger, they broke apart and formed two competing conflict resolution agencies, we would probably have difficulty trusting either one. However, if the disagreement was over the best methods to resolve conflict, and the individuals, in cooperation with each other, decided the best thing to do was to start two different agencies, each with its own unique method—well, then people would just pick the one that’s right for them or their situation.

Well, the Church’s business is love. First for God, then for the church, then for the world. Trouble is, the church fails all three of these. The problem is not unity in a geographical or even theological sense. The problem is love—or lack thereof.

When Christians love God, and love and respect one another, regardless of disagreements over fringe-topics, the unity that Jesus is speaking about here is fulfilled and people do see it. Christians should be encouraged by this, and empowered to love and respect even their brothers and sisters they have disagreements with.

Of course, on a larger level, this is all null and void until the ‘church’ makes love for God and people her main objective— instead of the next gigantic mortgage payment on her brand new church building.

We’ve all got these people. The ones who are challenging to have relationships with for one reason or another. Maybe they’ve got a really prideful attitude. Or, maybe they’re constantly debasing themselves for attention. Or maybe they’ve got a mentality that the world has wronged them and everyone somehow owes them for it.

You get the point. These are difficult people to love, let alone be in relationship with—Especially when they’re in the church.

These are often the most difficult people to pray for. You might even find yourself praying selfish prayers for them. Prayers that revolve more around their changing to be an easier person for you to deal with than for their own real benefit.

When I’m praying for a person who is particularly difficult for me, I usually stick to these prayer habits:

1. First, I pray for humility on my part.

A lot of the time, what makes a person difficult is that in one way or another they press my own pride and make me want to assert myself. This is unnecessary and a hindrance to my prayers and love.

2. Second, I pray for patience on my part.

Being impatient makes everything seem worse than it really is. In relationships like these, it’s easy to blow someone’s behavior out of proportion. Gone unchecked, this sometimes results in my demonizing that person. With patience, this is less likely to happen.

3. Third, I pray for compassion on my part.

People with really aggravating mannerisms, victim-mentalities, and unprovoked prideful-self assertion (I’m sure there are others) issues almost never get that way for no reason. And, the behavior almost never stops there. Often it has to do with identity and self-worth issues; things that, with time, Jesus brings healing to. So I pray for compassion to remember that these things are an indication that this person needs Jesus just like me.

4. Finally, I pray that God would convict sin, bring encouragement, increase faith and ground in community.

Sin always hinders us and discouragement often holds us back. So, I pray that God would bring healing in these places and that with it, their faith would increase. Community is an essential part of these changes in our lives, so I pray that they would find deeper roots in the Church.

Obviously, where I know of pressing issues in their hearts, I also pray for those. But usually only after having prayed for myself.

Jesus commanded us to pray for our enemies. How much more to pray for our brothers and sisters who just really get under our skin. With grace and by prayer all of us will have the strength to do it. So, lets do it.